Resolve

A year ago, I balanced managing my home, working, caring for family, and keeping a healthy and regular writing schedule. Now, I wake up wondering if I will feel well enough to put “pen to paper”. I’m grateful that I have the ability to create at a level that meets my standards. The frequency is wanting. This is a problem because I write full length novels. If I wrote children’s books, I could still feel productive and enjoy more immediate gratification. There are many reasons why my days as an active writer resemble anything but a full work day. I also make the choice everyday to continue my circus styled balancing act in the scope that fits my current health situation. Working is not an option, which is bittersweet. I focus on what I can accomplish and put as much into it as I can.

My doctors tell me that physically I’m ready to resume a “normal” life. My reality tends to fall short. I can’t express how frustrating this is for me. I’m responsible for my success as a writer. Presently, I’m holding myself back in my eyes. I shouldn’t be so candid. I should find a way to project a positive image. I need to answer the questions that may be out there from my readers like, when is her next book coming out? Is she still writing? How sick is she really? While this post isn’t good for marketing, it is good for me to give a realistic expectation and settle any uncertainty.

I’m still here and I’m still writing. I only ask for patience, support, and prayers.